“[Getting five kids into bed] is like dealing with terrorists. You have to cajole them, and you have to negotiate … it’s really the opposite of a hostage situation — instead of trying to get people out of there, you’re trying to keep them in there: I’ll give you whatever you want! What do you want, a helicopter to Cuba? Anything, just stay in there and don’t hurt anyone.”
Gaffigan says having children has made him a better comedian — and living in the city has helped him raise better kids.